Morning. How are you doing today?
Are you always positive? Do you have days that you just ask “Why?” I’ve been having a lot of days like that lately. Truly, it’s been a real struggle.
Recently, I had to remove pork and beef from my diet. If you have followed along with the blog, then you already know that the foods that I can eat are very few. It has been hard. I try really hard to live a clean, healthy lifestyle. I have many food allergies, so I cook 95% of everything that I eat. And I have a repetitive diet. Its a real struggle sometimes to figure out how I am going to make the chicken breast and sweet potato today.
And now I have developed something with my skin. When you try to do everything correctly, and things still go wrong, it hurts. A lot.
It’s getting hard to stay positive about my health. Sometimes I think, why go through all of this. So what I was 25 lbs heavier. And I took medication for acid reflux, and needed medication for high cholesterol. At least I was able to go out and eat like a normal person. Enjoy time out with friends, instead of every time having to again explain why I can’t just taste a little. Or the fear that a new restaurant that doesn’t know me, will do something wrong.
And I hate that I have to spend money on food that I probably won’t like. Who wants to go out to dinner for a dry piece of plain chicken breast, and plain steamed broccoli? Mr. Table and I used to go out to eat all the time. We would go with friends, order lots of food to share. Have drinks and a great time. Now I get scared if someone sticks their fork on my dish if they have been eating something that I know will make me sick.
I try to remind myself to be thankful that I am still here. I am breathing and 6 feet, well maybe only 5’3″, but I am above ground. I have a husband that I love beyond words, and I know loves me back. I have the most amazing son. A best friend in my cat. A beautiful life with a family that I love, and loves me in return.
I will overcome this. What doesn’t kill us, makes us stronger, right? I must be Mrs. Hulk.
I pray you are all well. Thanks for letting me vent today. I’ll have a recipe for you next time.